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Performance Sheeting

Updated: Sep 4, 2021

Dr. Jan's Humor

I had made a major decision-I needed new summer sheets for my bed. I'm not a shopper and I certainly don't keep up with what's available in bedding. However, I did know I wanted 100% cotton, light weight, decent thread count, queen size sheets. I assumed I'd have one option and it would be a quick trip.

So I was at the store, in the correct department and just needed to pick up a light colored set and check out. But, to my surprise there wasn't just one choice. They had Egyptian, Hotel, selections now I can't even remember. Oh my, I wondered what I should do? I had to be at an appointment in 20 minutes. Should I just walk out? That sounded good, but on second thought, I still needed a set of new sheets. Okay I decided to give myself five minutes to find the perfect ones and leave. (What stress.)

Interestingly, at that moment my eyes fell on the words, "Cools you when hot, warms you when cold." I envisioned the edges of these wonders to wrap tightly around me when I felt cold and a gentle breeze blowing over and under me when I felt warm. WOW! What more could I want?

Some place on the package it said Cotton and 100%. Plus it touted, "Performance Sheet Set." I could hear a quietly playing orchestra. I checked out and could hardly wait until I would be home, washing these fantastic sheets.

Finally, bed time arrived. I was so excited, I couldn't sleep. I kept waiting for the "Performance." I had my room cool. After wakeful hours I succumbed to pulling on my little night socks, adding a light cotton cover and falling to sleep. I can't say my night was a "lightning strike" event, but I decided the sheets would work out okay.

Curiosity caused me to research my purchase. I learned I had bought 100% Hygrocotton sheets. The technology used in making these sheets created hollow cores within 100% cotton yarn; the end result actually included up to 10% polyester.

The Moral of this story is- you might like to invite me to tea, or for coffee but you don't want to invite me to go shopping with you. 😂

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